I worry and worry and worry. And then, I look around, and see that nothing is happening. There is no murder to cover up. There is no masculine growth suppression to support Mother in her anger towards men. There is no grieving woman to be silent around. There is no war, prison and resultant PTSD to cope with. There is no large, loud, angry young man to fear. No one is making fun of me. No one is trying to hurt or disregard me. I have not been cast aside like warped lumber. It is my excited heart that I am feeling, not these worries. It is my life, my excitement. That’s what I’m feeling. It is a shift in perspective. A shift from old neurotic nervous energy grounded in the past to the feeling of being truly alive for the future. I choose the future. I choose excitement over anxiety. I choose a life of passion. That is the conscious choice I am making. To live a life worth living.