How much of my peace of mind is invested in food, specifically starchy carbs and sugar? When I am falling, they catch me. They stabilize me. They numb and placate me. I am surely a carb addict. There is no question.

I am faced with a dilemma every night. Each night it’s the same thing. My reasonable, conscious side tells me not to eat starchy foods at night because I am trying to live a healthier lifestyle. My body doesn’t seem to care about this. My unconscious mouth, stomach and brain want what they want and overcome the conscious reasonableness.

Suddenly, I am in a feeding frenzy. It feels chemical. I can’t stop. Once the flood gates open forget about it. I am lost in an unconscious carb induced numbness.

This is one of my major struggles right now. It’s a daily battle. Like most things, I hope writing and sharing this on my blog will help me to win this battle within myself. Thanks for being a part of my healing process.